I Never Thought
by Pillow Talker
Summary: My big sister is Jade. I'm Cassie. Sometimes I'm more trouble than it's worth but she saved my life. She made my dreams come true in more ways than one. You've heard bits & pieces of my love story in hers, now I'll tell you how it really went down with me and James. Side story to Chasingmydreams87's Topsy Turvey.
1. Chapter 1

I love my sister. I really do but there are some things I wish she didn't know. I just can't do anything about it because I'm still a minor. Well at least for another nine months in the eyes of the law. Until then, she's my legal guardian. I am thankful every day that she came to my rescue from our home life considering the hell she was going through on her own. I'm a young girl falling in love for the very first time and when she's not around, I have my adorable little niece as her eyes. But if it hadn't been for her, he would have never started talking to me that day.

_"Why is that boy watching us Aunt Cassie?" Gracie's eyes had briefly diverted from the screen._

_"Huh?" I looked up and the little turkey took me down yet again on her favorite Wii game._

_"You're too easy Aunt Cassie. "She giggled._

_"I let you win Curly Sue," I said and pulled her onto my lap._

_"I bet I can beat you," Came the voice from across the room. _

_"Who is that?"_

_"One of those stupid boys you don't like," I replied as I made eye contact with him._

"Do you?"

_"Why don't we let him play you and see if he really can beat you." I smiled at him. He was kind of cute. _

_"Prepare to be defeated little lady," he said as he took a place on the couch next to us. _

_"Nobody beats me right Aunt Cassie?" She said defiantly but looked up to me for reassurance._

_"Why don't we play him and see if he can beat the two of us," I said as I smiled at him yet again. I kept getting this fluttery feeling in my stomach when he smiled back. I didn't like guys like him. He was almost prettier than me. Almost being the key word._

_"What do I get if I win?" He flirted._

_"You have to win to find out but she is undefeated."_

_"So she's not yours?"_

"You thought?" I laughed. " I was a baby myself when she was born."

_"So who does she belong to?"_

_"My sister, Jade."_

"Jade is your sister?"

"You're not afraid of her are you?"

_"Should I be?"_

"Everybody's afraid of Mommy and if you don't get to playing with me soon, you will be too," Gracie grinned sweetly.

_"Well I guess we should get to playing then," he returned._

_"See, that's all you have to do Aunt Cassie. Boys aren't that dumb," Gracie said to me and grabbed her controller._

_That kid could make me blush. We really hadn't got to talk to the guys since the tour started a week ago and he and I had been doing the flirting with your eyes thing since then. Gracie was a watchdog and I had to watch myself when it came to her._

_"James! Let's go! It's time for the meet and greet!" One of the others poked his head in the door. I didn't know them all by name yet but I recognized his face. Now I had a name to go with the face I was starting to have a thing for. _

_"You mean he's not gonna play with us Aunt Cassie?" Gracie pouted. _

_"He can't right now Gracie. He has to work," I answered her. _

_"I owe you one okay?" He answered her._

_"You better or Mommy will hurt you."_

_"Then I'll make sure you're on my schedule for tomorrow okay?"_

"Okay," she agreed.

_"It was nice to finally meet you Cassie," He said with that smile of his. Oh God did it make me want to do things I shouldn't be doing at my age._

_"Come on James! Let's go!"_

"Shut up Logan! I'll be there in a minute!"

_I smiled shyly at being the cause of his tardiness. "It was nice to meet you James."_

_"See ya later!" He said as he left the room._

_"Do you like him Auntie Cassie?" Gracie inquired after he left._

_"I don't know."_

"I think you want him to be your boyfriend."

_"I think you need to mind your own business little miss nosey butt," I teased her but she was right. I did like him. There was no denying that._

So that was the first time we spoke. Exciting huh? When you're my age, anything a guy does is exciting but I still have to contend with Jade. She's not happy at all about how this all developed being as he's older than me. She's one to talk. I saw the way she looked at Kendall the first time they set eyes on each other. I may be young but I'm certainly not blind. Sometimes I wish my life were different but I got a huge break and Jade wasn't about to let me spoil it for some boy. To me, he wasn't just any boy. To me he was already becoming the man of my dreams.


	2. Chapter 2

Jade and I get along like all sisters do but now she made the rules as well. Every once in a while I thought I would have been better off at home then I remembered how awful it was. Jade is most certainly the better alternative despite my budding romance with James. Just when I think he can't get any sweeter, he goes and does something that just blows me away. I remember the first time he actually held my hand.

_We were three weeks into the tour and I done my set for the night. We were staying overnight and leaving the next morning. Jade and I always shared a room when we did this. I wanted to stay for their show but Jade wouldn't let me. We had to get Gracie back to the hotel and down for the night. I really hate being a teenager sometimes. We were about to get ready for bed ourselves that night when the knock on the door came._

_"Why don't you go grab that while I turn the TV off okay?" Jade said. _

_Being the teenager I was, I grumbled and headed toward the door. I peeked through the peephole and called for Jade. "It's for you." I know I'm a brat but Kendall was standing on the other side of the door by himself I assumed. I didn't see anybody else._

_When she opened the door, I saw the smile light up his face and I knew my sister was so far gone on him it wasn't even funny. I didn't even have to see her face to know that. He asked if THEY could join us for a little while before it was time to hit the sack. They?_

_The rest of them followed him in and I got that fluttery feeling in my stomach again when I saw James. "Hi." He smiled at me._

_"Hi." I smiled back; shyly. I prayed to God Jade was too lost in Kendall's eyes to notice the way James was paying attention to me. I was sure the others had noticed but I didn't think they'd say anything. Had to be a guy code or something._

_He sat next to me on the couch as did Logan(well he was on the other side of him). Kendall and Jade sat as far away from each other as they could. I knew she was scared to get involved with anybody ever again but I also could tell that Kendall wasn't that kind of guy. Believe you me, I had a lot of trust issues myself when it came to men considering the home we grew up in but years of therapy had taught me that all men aren't jerks and hit women for recreation. I guess my mom would never figure that out. But back to our evening with the boys. Carlos suggested we play a game of truth or dare. Logan and I got the easier questions. Of course Logan asked mine._

_Since I hadn't been asked this one in interviews, it was only fair I be asked here. _

_"Okay, truth Cassie. How old were you when you got your first kiss?"_

_Not even Jade knew that one. She thought the boy on the couch when I was fourteen was the first. Nowhere near close." I was twelve and it was my first slow dance in junior high."_

_"Cassie!" Jade looked at me like I had two heads all of a sudden._

_"What? Just because your my sister doesn't mean you know everything that's ever happened to me," I replied confidently. "You know enough as it is anyway. Not like I have to tell you. Ever since you had Gracie it's like you have a sixth sense."_

_"Well that is true."_

I just rolled my eyes before looking at her." Okay big sister. Truth or dare?"

"You know better little sis. Dare."

_I knew she was going to hate me after but it was the only way they were going to yank their heads out of their butts and admit something was there. "You asked for it. Kiss Kendall and I don't mean one of those you plant on Gracie's cheek every night either."_

_I think it was the first time I'd ever known her to protest." Really?"_

"Well if you don't I will," I challenged her and they all looked at me like I was nuts; especially James.

_I whispered in his ear. "She hates it when I challenge her."_

_"What are you two being so secretive for?" She demanded. _

_"Nothing you need to worry about. Now if you don't take the dare, you know I'll be way worse with the truth."_

_She huffed and made her way over to Kendall. "Let's do this." She took his hand and he rose from the chair. She stumbled slightly and he caught her in the small of her back. I could see it the minute their eyes locked as he pulled her back up. The minute their lips connected, they were through denying what they felt. _

_I wanted somebody to kiss me with all the passion in the world like Kendall was kissing her but I knew it would be a long time before anybody would kiss me like that. But as the two of them remained liplocked and oblivious to the rest of us, James took my hand in his and something told me it wouldn't be that long before he would be kissing me just like that._

That kiss would come sooner than I thought. Jade's sixth sense has kicked in about James and me but I'm not about to let that deter me from being around and spending time with him. It's horrible when we have to be on the buses. All I can do is text him until the next gas stop. It isn't fair that Kendall gets to spend time on my bus but I can't bring anyone on. She keeps telling me it's because she's the adult. When do I get to be an adult?


	3. Chapter 3

I can't blame Jade for being overprotective and there is a limit. Why don't I get to be young and stupid in love like she is? She's not that old in my book. I know my parents took a few years between us but it's not like she's ancient or nothing. She still knows all the popular songs, knows all the current movies and television shows and she still has a young heart. I SO keep praying she'll open it up and let Kendall have all of it one day.

James has always been a gentleman but he was a gentleman far too long before our first kiss.

_It was the night after she left to go home and wrap up all that business with Todd's family. Asshole deserved what he got. I just hoped the prick didn't hurt anybody else in the process of his downward spiral. I watched their show from backstage(not an easy task) but I took off just before the encore and went to my bus to freshen up. I was getting to that point where I didn't want to be around James unless I was all dolled up. Call me shallow but I'm the girl and intended on remaining the prettier of us two. He seemed to like it that way. I told security that he was going to be riding with me. They had their reservations about it but I assured them that I would behave myself. Even told them that I gave Jade my word on no funny business. _

_He was my boyfriend. It was MY bus. I was going to make sure that I took full advantage of it in Jade's absence. I knew I wasn't ready to have sex with him yet but I did want to do more than just hold hands all the time. I wasn't Amish for crying out loud. I felt the front of the bus shift and I heard him greeting everybody up front. There went that fluttery thing again. It happened every time I knew he was coming or was near me. _

_There he was. I started feeling something new. My heart started beating faster than it usually did but I was planning on doing something that I knew he wasn't going to do anytime soon. He took my hand, smiled and leaned in to peck me on the cheek but I made sure it was my lips he hit. I knew I caught him off guard but it had to be done. He pulled back but I held his hand firm and led him back to the bedroom. I had a feeling it was the eyes we had on us._

_"What was that Cassie?"_

"Something I knew you wouldn't do."

_"Because I know what your sister would do if she found me doing anything other than holding your hand."_

_"James, "I laid my hand against his chest," Jade's not here," I said and gently brushed my lips against his throat. "The munchkin's not here." I traveled further up his neck with my lips. "The guys are probably thinking it's about damned time." My lips skimmed over his chin. "And THEY are not paid to get into my business unless I'm being harmed." I met his lips full on as I held onto his shoulder. I felt his hands move down onto my waist as our lips remained occupied._

_My hand moved from his shoulder and slid up into his gorgeous hair. God it had been so worth the wait but I could have done it sooner had I not had Gracie's little eyes on me every second of the day I was with him. I felt his hands slide over my back. It was the first time I'd really had his arms completely surround me. I know I'm young and everything is a first for me but to feel so secure in such a short amount of time, I had a feeling there was more to this than just a teenage crush. _

_I'd kissed a few boys in my life but he was the first man and he was not disappointing in the least. My friends had gone out with college guys and had told me the stories of how clumsy they were. That they didn't know up from down. James sure knew what he was doing. When his tongue slipped between my lips it didn't feel like a snake slithering in there. We were so caught up we barely felt the bus jerk into motion. I thought I heard Frank's voice but I was in a fog of complete and utter bliss and had no intention of coming out anytime soon. _

_As he slowly ended our first kiss, I looked up into his eyes and breathlessly replied, "Wow."_

_"Yeah. Maybe we should watch that movie?" He suggested; still pretty breathless himself._

_"Good idea. I'll go get the popcorn and you set up the movie."_

_"Cas?"_

_I turned back to him and said, "Yeah?"_

_"You know I would have kissed you if it hadn't been for Jade."_

"I know."

_"But I like the way you took control."_

_I blushed. "I'll be back with the popcorn in a few." I reached up and kissed him before I made the short journey to the kitchenette._

So for the next three weeks I get to spend the night with my boyfriend. At least I hope I do. I don't think he'd argue spending the night snuggled up next to me. I like snuggling up with him.

Like I said, I feel safe with his arms wrapped around me. I know it sounds silly but I'm a young girl and despite my sister trusting them to take care of me, it felt kind of creepy to have the security guards on the bus with me alone. I know they don't want to lose their jobs but it was still creepy to me. It feels better with James next to me. Call me crazy, but I am a teenager after all. Am I really supposed to make that much sense?


	4. Chapter 4

So I got to spend three wonderful weeks on my bus every night with James when we traveled. God only knows what Kendall's gonna tell her. That's if they're still speaking. I guess big sis wasn't answering any of his calls. I felt so bad. I couldn't tell him she was checking in with me every two or three days. I guess James was passing on that Jade was communicating with us. My heart really went out to him. I know my sister all too well and since the whole situation with Todd, she hasn't let those walls down. Kendall's not perfect by any means but he's the closest thing to it as far as I can see. Yet as we've established, I'm young. My ideas about relationships are idealistic at best. My sister has however, taught me that a relationship is built on common interests and trust. Trust being the big key.

I forgot when she was getting back and I'd gotten so wrapped up in James that my head was in the clouds half the time. There's nothing wrong with that as long as you float back down to reality now and then. I think Jade kept forgetting that I am still a teenager and I can be more moody than she can but when she got here today, she practically snapped mine and his head off for kissing. KISSING! Granted, our sessions had got a little more heated than the first one but really?! It's not like she'd never not seen me do it before. I don't think it had anything to do with the fact that we were kissing. I think it had to do with that wall she kept putting up every time Kendall tried breaking through. I could see bits and pieces of my best friend coming back but she always managed to put it right back up.

As if the day couldn't get any worse, she decided to cut off all her hair. I felt so bad for Kendall. Just because I have a boyfriend doesn't mean I'm so self-absorbed I don't notice what's going on around me. When I would watch their shows, I could see it. It was a masquerade day after day. He'd put on one face for the public but the minute he ducked behind the scenes, I could see her lack of communication slowly ripping him apart inside. Back to Jade's hair though. The last time she did this was when she left Todd. The way he treated my sister, I swore I'd never let a man treat me like that or it'd be the last breath he ever took. I know it wasn't her fault. I always knew that.

I got on the bus with her and Gracie and took the little munchkin so she could get some rest. I know it wasn't today that had run her ragged. The last few weeks had finally caught up with her. Gracie was adorable, charming self as always. I swear she had Logan wrapped around her finger. I thought it was rather cute myself. Her first real crush just like mine. Only I crushed on Jade's first 'real' boyfriend. She was in junior high and his name was Gary. He never treated me like the little brat that I was at six years old.

_I told Jade I would make sure that Curly Sue was unharmed while she slept but to be honest, I was a little worried leaving her with James. I know that sounds bad but I knew she'd been left with the others a hundred times. I knew he wouldn't hurt her but I knew enough that he could be distracted from her. Especially before a show. _

_I was right but she had apparently forgiven Logan because they were playing and giggling when I came offstage. "I see all is well here."_

"Aunt Cassie!" She grinned and leapt onto my lap in the green room.

_"Oh Curly Sue. Aunt Cassie just came offstage. Her legs hurt baby. Can you give me a minute?"_

She pondered it for a second before Logan swept her up out of my lap. "Hey!" She protested.

_"She just needs a minute Boo Boo. That's a lot of work for one person out there."_

"Do you get tired Logie Bear?" She fluttered her little eyelashes at him. Lord did she have Jade down to a T.

_"Well, of course I do but I always have time for my favorite girl. Why don't we take a walk and let Aunt Cassie and James talk," he answered her when James walked in the room._

_"They're just gonna smooch if we do."_

"I don't think so tonight. Let's go."

He sat down next to me. I should have been mad but I wasn't. At least he didn't leave her alone. "You're not mad at me are you?"

"I should be."

"I'm sorry." He took my hand and pressed his lips against the back of it.

_"It's okay. I don't know why she was mad at him to begin with but I think I have an idea considering I crushed on Jade's first boyfriend when I was her age."_

"And what was that reason?"

"It's a girl thing. You don't need to know Mr. Maslow." I smiled and kissed him.

_"I told you!" Gracie's little voice came from the doorway separating us yet again._

_I kissed him once again. "I'll be back. As for you Curly Sue, we're heading to the bus so you can go to bed."_

"I don't want to."

"I promised your mom we'd be back to the bus and get you ready for bed after I was done."

"Can't Logie Bear do it?" She whined.

_"I would love to Boo Boo but I have to go on shortly. Sweet dreams princess," He pecked her on the cheek and handed her over to me._

_"Goodnight Logie Bear!" She called back over my shoulder as we headed for the buses. Once she was ready, I read her a story and carried her to the back of the bus to lay her down by Jade. I tried so hard not to wake her but she stirred. I had changed as well._

_Half asleep, Jade said, "Did you have a good show?"_

"The best."

"Did Gracie behave?"

"Yes. Jade, I'm going back to watch the show. You're still tired. We'll talk in the morning."

"Okay," She rolled back over and went back to sleep. Thank God Gracie went down easy. 

_I made my way back inside and watched them. I couldn't take my eyes off James. I guess I was officially head over heels in love with him. There was no other way to explain it. I got a kick out of watching him wink at the girls in the front row knowing I'd be the one he'd come offstage to and kiss later. My favorite number was Show Me mainly because of the way Kendall moved his hips but that's between us. I love James but Kendall does know how to move it. _

_"Great show," I greeted him with a kiss once he had freshened up. _

_"Thank you but shouldn't you be on your bus by now?"_

"Yes but I'm taking advantage of Jade's wipeout tonight. Gracie is down for the count so I thought I'd enjoy the show while I could."

_"I see." He took me in his arms and kissed me like he never had before. Wow! It even earned us a groan. _

_"God you two! Get a room already," Carlos commented._

_I pulled away from him and said, "I should get back to my bus. I'll text you when I get there." I gave him one last kiss and headed to my bus. It was the best evening I'd had with him yet._

The next day did not turn out like I had planned. I was going to spend some alone time after we got the whole Kendall/Jade situation worked out but as fate would have it, I got my ass in trouble for mouthing off to her. God I hate her! I know it wasn't right to air her dirty laundry in front of them but she made me mad. I couldn't even talk to him. And she grounded me! Really?!


	5. Chapter 5

_When I first saw Cassie, I thought she was just another teenage girl with a mad crush on me. I know that sounds a little self-centered but come to find out, she had no idea who I was. It was her little niece Gracie that had the mad crush on the group. Until the tour started going full swing, little Gracie really didn't make it known who her favorite was. She just kind of became attached to Logan._

_As for Cassie, she was working on a song when I first introduced myself. It may sound weird but some people you just click with and she definitely turned out to be one of those. We could talk for hours if Gracie didn't get in the way. I found she was more grown up than her seventeen years but she was still a teenage girl. I had to remind myself of that every time I wanted to do more than hold her hand in the beginning. _

_It was great for three weeks when Jade was gone. Jade seemed to run interference where our lips were concerned. I couldn't have even kissed Cassie if I tried. Then little miss Gracie decided to turn the temperature down on us one afternoon when we were making out on the couch in the green room. Let's not forget Cassie mouthing off to Jade and getting her butt grounded from even talking to me while we were on the buses. I knew Jade had her reasons. Not that I agreed but that was between them and all I could do is let Cassie vent when Jade would let us speak. And last but not least, that night on the bus when Carlos sat between us. I'm sure that was Gracie's doing as well._

_Then there was the night I really screwed up. The night I thought Jade would make me less of a man for almost violating her little sister. We got carried away but Cassie was the one to put the brakes on. _

We got Kendall's romantic evening for Jade set up then joined the rest of them in one of our rooms. I really want to be alone with her tonight and the way she has Carlos and Logan wrapped around her little finger, I don't think leaving Gracie with the two of them will be a problem.

Cassie has her fingers tangled in mine and she's resting her head against my shoulder as we sat on the couch watching one of Gracie's favorites. I'm not sure which one but if we didn't get out here pretty soon, we were going to hear some whining.

I stood up and brought Cassie along with me; our hands still linked. "We're going to take a walk." I announced.

Gracie turned her head and remarked," No you're not. You're gonna go in the next room and smooch. "

Why is that kid so smart? I really could care less to be honest. I led Cassie out of the room and down the hall to the door to the one next to mine and Kendall's. Thank God she paired us up so I didn't have to worry about anyone walking in on us. Well at least not tonight. I slid the key through the electronic slot and turned the handle when it turned green. I slipped the key in my pocket and led her into the room. Turning the bedside light on, it was just enough for us to see each other without being overwhelming. Sitting on the bed, I pulled her onto my lap.

"Hi." She smiled shyly.

"Alone at last. What do you think we should do?" I pushed the hair away that was draping around her face.

She leaned in and kissed me so softly and slowly that I didn't realize she was undoing the buttons on my shirt until she was halfway down.

"Cass." I gently gripped her wrists where they were.

"What's wrong?"

"Are you sure you wanna go there?"

She answered me with her lips. I eased further back onto the bed before bringing her down with me. Her hands tentatively moved over my chest as she stared into my eyes. Her eyes left mine as her lips moved onto my neck and down over my chest. She stopped briefly and slowly peeled the buttons of her cute little pink blouse; all the while staring into my eyes. God she has the most amazing blue eyes! She tossed her shirt aside then resumed where she left off. She didn't go much further than my abs before moving back up to my lips. More like kissing me full on the mouth. She knew how to kiss that's for sure.

I wanted to feel her body beneath mine and I knew that wasn't going to happen unless I took control. As we kissed, I moved so her back was against the bed. Without losing too much contact from her lips, I removed my shirt." I love you so much Cassie," I whispered in her ear before my lips took a trip down her body. Along with my hands of course. Thank God she had one of those little front closures on her bra.

I felt her tremble when my lips surfaced against her breast and I stopped to see if she was okay. I wasn't going to push into anything she wasn't ready for. "Please don't stop." Her voice was barely above a whisper.

I circled her nipple with my tongue before taking it between my teeth. The pink little nub growing stiffer as I wrapped my lips around it. I found myself moving back up to her lips. I loved kissing her and the way she felt beneath me half naked was more than I'd ever dreamed of.

I guess we went a little too far because the minute my hand slid down inside her leggings, she stopped me. I should have known she wasn't completely ready for this but I let my hormones overpower my logic.

She curled up to the side and I could tell she was upset.

"Cass look at me, "I whispered in her ear.

She turned with tears in her eyes. "You must hate me for getting you all worked up like that."

"Cass, it takes two. I'm not mad. "I pulled her against my chest and eased back against the bed.

"You're not?" She pulled her head up long enough to look at me.

"I'm sure. Nothing happens until your absolutely ready okay?"

"I love you."

"I love you too." It was the first time we'd said the words but I knew it'd be the last if Jade ever found out.

And she did. I honestly thought she'd kill me. I'm sure she'd thought about it but the real shocker came the day after that when she apologized to me. I can't blame her for wanting to protect her little sister but I think she's finally starting to realize Cassie isn't so little anymore.

As for Cassie and me, it will be a long time before anything like that happens again.


	6. Chapter 6

I still don't believe that Jade apologized to James. The reason it's such a big deal is that Jade has never admitted to being wrong or apologized for doing anything in her life. And to admit she was out of line with him, well that means the world to me. He's still afraid to touch me in front of her. The key being in front of her. He still kisses me and holds my hand when she's not around.

I must be really in love because I miss him the minute he walks away from me until the minute he sweeps me into his arms again. I know it sounds really corny and chick flick romantic but it's the way he makes me feel. Even after that night. I try to talk to him about it but he just keeps avoiding it. I guess there's a time and place for everything so I'll give up for now.

Then there's today. I'm at a photo shoot, locked in a bathroom because they want me to dress like a slut. I'm not that kind of girl and Jade is not having any of it either. She and the guys are on their way back from the radio interview to do a photo shoot as well. The lady is a total bitch and I know Jade is going to take her down . Come to find out, she had to compromise. She brought James' jacket with her and went to work with what we had. I put his jacket on and a part of me started feeling closer to him.

_I sat alone by the dressing table twirling in my chair when I felt it stop. I looked up and I knew I was reflecting that same goofy smile he had on his face that I had on mine every time he looked at me. "Hi."_

_"I missed you," he replied then kissed me._

_"I missed you too," I said as we moved back to a normal position._

_He spun the chair to face him and complimented the job Jade had done on my outfits so far. "I like the way you look in my clothes."_

_I blushed but he always made me feel good about myself. Even being as confident as I was onstage, I was still an insecure seventeen year old when it came to matters of the heart. "Would you like me to model it for you?"_

_"What do you think?" He raised his brows knowingly._

_"Move then." I smiled and rose from the chair. I posed and twirled around for him before almost falling flat on my behind. Luckily he caught me and pulled me back up. These friggin heels made me almost as tall as him._

_"Are you okay baby?"_

_"I'm good."_

_"You know how hot you look in my jacket?" He uttered low enough for only my ears to catch._

_My arms already around his neck, I captured his lips. I loved the way he kissed. I loved the way he touched me. As I said, I just loved the way it felt being in his arms. I assumed he'd been wearing the jacket earlier in the day because it smelled of him. Jade teased me earlier when I got that goofy look on my face when she told me I'd be wearing it. She wore Kendall's clothes all the time. Maybe that's why it wasn' t such a big deal to her as it was to me. His was the first piece of men's clothing I'd ever worn. I felt his hands slide up under it as our kiss intensified but it was Kendall's voice that separated us. I blushed as I passed him and made my way toward the set._

_I knew Jade saw that silly assed grin I had when I came onto the set but she ignored it until she came back with me for a wardrobe change. "I know something happened back here earlier but what I'm not sure of."_

_"You worry too much Jade."_

_"I know you little sister. Be careful."_

_I just rolled my eyes at her. She didn't know what she was talking about. How could she remember what it's like to be so young and so in love? I know she's only two years older than James but I think she kept her walls up for so long she forgot what it felt like to look into someone's eyes and get completely lost. That one simple thing was your undoing. I know she loves me but she really is going to have to learn to let go. I can only imagine what it's gonna be like when Gracie starts getting interested in boys and dating._

_"Don't you roll your eyes at me. It wasn't that long ago I was your age and wanted to spend every second of the day with my boyfriend."_

_"Okay!" I held my hands up in surrender. God! I hated when she got up on her soapbox._

_She took my hands and got all serious on me."Cas, you've got your whole life ahead of you and I think you realized that the other night. If he's worth his weight, you'll be worth the wait for him. You may not be his first but I'm pretty sure you're gonna be his last."_

_That was the first positive thing I'd heard her say all day. I hugged her so tight I nearly squeezed the breath out of her. "Thank you sis."_

It ended up being a great photo shoot. Jade and I came upon Kendall and I come to find out was his Dad. His parents were here. It couldn't be good but Jade was as cool as a cucumber like she always is. All I want to do is find James and not let go. I had no idea how what would come between us.


	7. Chapter 7

I don't understand why he's so far away. We've been in the same room with Carlos and holding hands before. I am sure Carlos is Gracie's doing. She means well but just because she thinks we shouldn't be alone like Mommy and Daddy, doesn't mean I don't want to not be alone with my boyfriend. Her heart is in the right place. I love her to death but it is getting a little annoying.

When Carlos left us to relieve himself, I made my move. As I scooted closer to James, he scooted further down the couch. I really didn't understand his animosity today. I 'm afraid to say anything but one of us has to. "Why are you treating me like a disease today?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Carlos has been in the same room with us I don't know how many times and you won't even hold my hand. Why?"

"Maybe because there are eyes everywhere and I can't ever be alone with you and touch when I want to."

Were we going to have a fight? God I hope not but it sure feels like it." Do you think I like constantly being babysat by my sister?"

"It's not just your sister. It's Gracie sitting Carlos between us on the bus, sending him to be with us right now. I'd kill to have five minutes with you Gracie free!" He shot back.

"I love my niece but do you think I enjoy constantly being watched?"

"Why don't you say something then?"

"Do you remember what happened last time I said something?"

"Yeah I do!"

"You knew you were getting a package deal when we decided to make it known to my sister!"

"Yeah but I didn't think we'd be babysat by my friends and drowned by your niece!"

"She's six years old. She doesn't know any better!"

"Apparently neither do I!"

"What?!"

"I thought I could handle this. I thought you were different. "

"This isn't about my family's interference. This is about me not sleeping with you the other night after I took charge!"

He was going to say something and I interrupted him before he had the chance to say another word.

"And don't you dare tell me it's not! I may be a teenage girl but I'm not stupid James! So just go find somebody to get your jollies because I won't be open for business until I'm good and ready!"

"Is that how you feel?!"

"Yes!"

"Then I think I will go out and find me a sweet little piece that won't get me all jacked up then turn it off!" He replied as he slammed the door behind himself.

Jerk! I should have learned from my sister's mistakes after all. God I hate him! I curled up on the bed and just let the tears flow. I really thought he was different. I felt the bed shift but I didn't hear a door open. It had to be Carlos.

"Where's James? Cas?"

"I don't care!"

"Cas?"

"Just leave me alone please Carlos. I don't feel like talking right now," I blubbered.

"Okay." The bed shifted and he was gone. Good!

He returned five minutes later. After a good cry with my sister and talking it out, we headed back to our room.

"Why don't you freshen up a little bit? You might feel better if you did," Jade suggested.

"I think I will. Thanks again sis. I don't know what I'd do without you." I hugged her and found something to wear before I headed into the bathroom. I closed the door and I lost myself under the hot stream. I was with Gracie on the why do boys have to be so stupid train today. After a good, long run underneath the hot stream of water, I turned it off and stepped out. I looked at the counter and I forgot my makeup bag with my perfumes and deodorant in it. After securing the hotel towel around me, I swung the door open as I called out for my sister. "Jade could you grab my bag with the perfume and-" I cut myself off when I saw him sitting on the bed. I slammed the door and locked it. Shit!

"Cas, we need to talk. I said a lot of stupid things I shouldn't have. "

"Why should I believe you?"

"Because I'm here for one and for two, I have your makeup bag that you need."

"Is it lavender?"

"Yes."

I cracked the door enough for him to hand it to me. I hate him but there's still part of me that wants to hear what he has to say. "Let me get dressed then we'll talk."

"You got it." He handed me the bag and I closed the door; locking it once again.

As soon as I was dressed, I opened the door and slowly headed toward the couch where he was waiting for me. I sat down at the opposite end and he moved closer. I was still mad so I sarcastically remarked," I wouldn't want you to get too close. Somebody could walk in on us."

"I'm sorry Cassie. I just want to be able to hold your hand and do the things that normal couples do without somebody telling us you're too young to be doing them because you're not."

"I'm not?"

"Well age wise yes but you're a beautiful, intelligent woman where it matters to me."

"So all the stuff about sex?"

"I'd be crazy step out on you knowing your sister would castrate me. "

I laughed but it was true.

"I've been in love before Cassie but never like this. I'd die if I broke your heart."

I started to cry but they weren't tears of pain this time. It was the sweetest thing anybody had ever said to me. He really does love me. "I'm scared James."

"Me too baby but there's no one in the world I'd rather be traveling this road with than you."

I edged closer to him." You mean that?"

"I do," he replied as he nodded.

"I'm sorry too," I returned and slid right on over next to him so our knees were touching. He took my ever so gently. I love the way he holds my hand.

"What are you sorry for?"

"For thinking all you were in it for was…" I blushed. I couldn't even say it now.

"We'll know when the time is right Cas and it's not the time yet. "

" You know I love my niece but even I could have done without that water incident."

"That's never happened to me."

"Can I tell you something?" I attempted to hold off a giggle.

"What's so funny?"

"I did the same thing to Jade when I was her age."

"So she got the idea from you."

"I never said a word. She's a smart little girl."

"Sometimes too smart."

"I know. So are we good?"

"I really think that's up to you?"

I rest my hand on his thigh and leaned over; kissing him. "Is that a good answer?"

"Very good but aren't you worried about your sister walking in?"

"Well if she's gonna start treating me like an adult, she'd better get used to the fact that I do adult things."

"Good answer."

Luckily, Jade didn't walk in until we were through 'making up'. She picked a hell of a time to start treating me like an adult but boy am I glad she did!


	8. Chapter 8

I just introduced Jade and she is getting a very warm welcome. I love their fans. In the beginning I was scared to death that they would think I was one of those Britney wannabes but I proved myself over and over. I'm sure there are some that still think I am but there is always going to be somebody that doesn't like you. I've learned to get past that real fast. As soon as the applause subsided, Jade started the intro. James has no idea I wrote this song about him (even though it didn't start out that way). So much is going through my mind as I start singing. So much emotion behind it. I love him so much

_Soft pretty words whispered in her ear_

_A sweet, gentle kiss when he holds her near_

_Moonlight and roses I'd never have but you _

_Came along and took my hand _

_Led me down that path to a land that _

_Chorus:_

_I never thought it could happen to me_

_I never thought it would be_

_I never thought I'd feel those lips_

_I never thought it would ever really be but_

_Now it's finally me_

_What is that flutter every time that you smile_

_What is the reason that my heart flips every time_

_That we kiss_

_What is this power you have over me_

_I think you see that_

_(Chorus)_

_Bridge:_

_Now I'm walking on air with you next to me_

_Don't leave me now your love's captured me_

_(Chorus fades to the end)_

We finish and I thank the crowd for being so wonderful and head off stage not long after Jade. She and Kendall are cozy and Gracie is playing with Logan. It's really adorable the crush she has on him. Boys are stupid to her but she's attached to Logan.

My heart drops when I don't see James anywhere. He's the one I really want to talk to. Carlos sees the look on my face and immediately knows what's wrong." Don't worry Cas. He's in wardrobe. He'll be here before you know it."

No sooner were the words out of his mouth than James entered the room. My heart was racing. "Um peeps, shall we give these kids a couple minutes alone?" Carlos suggested.

Jade looked up and saw he was there. "Let's go guys. Five minutes and I'm coming back in," I heard Jade warn James.

He nodded and when the door was closed his eyes met mine. "I'm sorry I wasn't there when you came offstage. That was a wonderful song Cassie."

He didn't recognize it. I frowned.

"What's wrong?"

I hung my head and fidgeted.

"Angel face, what's wrong?" He tilted my chin up to look him in the eyes.

"You don't remember do you?"

"What should I be remembering?"

"That was the song I was working on when you finally got the nerve to talk to me."

"I'm sorry I don't remember."

"That song is about us."

He stepped back! Oh great! Why don't you just tell him you love him now? You may as well you idiot! You scared him. I couldn't stand there and look at him anymore. I started for the door and before I could get it open, his hand was over mine on the doorknob. "Cassie, I'm not upset."

I turned to face him." You're not?"

"No. I've just never had anybody write a song for me."

"Well it started out as a love song then it just kinda grew into what it was and I didn't know how to-" He cut me off with one of his breathtaking kisses and I forgot that Jade would be coming back for us. Like clockwork! I felt the door handle dig into my back and I knew it wasn't because he had me up against the door that tight. It separated us and I glared at Jade.

"Don't give me that look. I told you I was coming back. "

"I'll see you after the show Cass." He smiled and pecked me on the cheek before leaving Jade and me alone.

"You have some timing." I rubbed the back of my head as I sat down on the couch.

"One day you'll thank me."

" Yeah, yeah. Jade, how did you know you were ready?" I bit my lip as I looked at her.

"Ready for what?"

"To tell him you were in love with him?"

"When you are with the right person, you just know. You can look down the road and see them there holding your hand making you as happy as they do right now." She sighed and sat next to me where I now sat on the couch.

"You know you're in love when he's the only one you can ever see yourself with. You will know what he's thinking, feeling and you'll be able to read his moods at a glance. He will be your world, but he won't take over your life."

"When did you know you were ready to have sex?" She raised an eyebrow at me. "I know I'm not ready, I just want to know if there's a way I can tell."

"When it's the right time and place you'll know." She looked at the wall. "I know I should have never slept with Todd. I wasn't ready yet but I thought I loved him and I wanted to make him happy. With Kendall it was easy. He didn't push for more than I was willing to give him and he didn't leave me when I stopped us from going too far."

I was letting it all sink in. I mean they make movies where couples fall madly in love and just 'know' they've met the one but I'm seventeen and all starry eyed. I think the answer Jade was giving me was more realistic than any answer I'd ever got in my life. I mean I talked to the back- up dancers and they gave me these magical love story answers because anybody that was around me knew that James and I were together. We kept it out of the public eye because I was so young. They all had something in their contracts that kept them from leaking information.

"Have those girls been putting ideas in your head again?"

I sighed heavily and nodded. "Yeah, that's kind of why I asked you."

"Is James pushing you to do things you're not ready to do?"

"Oh God no Jade! He's the perfect gentleman even when you're not around. I know I'm young but I also know how I feel. We both know I've dated enough boys to know this is more than just a phase I'm going through right?"

"You tell me."

"Jade, I really like him. He's always there when I need him. Even when I don't."

"I think you said enough with the song. Did he like it?"

"He thought it was beautiful but he didn't recognize it. I got a little pouty but we worked it out."

"Cass, I know you're growing up but don't grow up too fast on me okay?" She hugged me.

"I'll try not to but I need to take a shower."

"Then James is definitely a keeper if he takes you smelly and all."

"Hey now!"

"I'm just kidding. I know he's a good guy but he is a GUY. Just be careful okay?"

"I will. I promise." I hadn't even bothered to wonder where my mischievious little niece was, I was just glad my sister was able to give it to me straight. I wonder how she's going to handle when I really do ask her about first time sex?


	9. Chapter 9

So we have to go shop for Jade's wedding dress. I can't remember the last time I saw my sister in a dress. Well there was prom and her first wedding but it was like pulling teeth to get her to wear one. I guess I'm the girlie girl of us because I love dresses. I love the way James looks at me when I wear a sundress. The way his eyes drift to my bare shoulders with nothing more than a tiny little spaghetti strap holding it up. There's even a difference in the way he holds me when I do. But today is about my big sis. She's the star of the show now.

Wow! I didn't believe it was my sister at first when she walked into the room. She actually looks like a girl. Scratch that, a woman in love no less. Kendall is going to flip when he sees her in this dress. I always thought my sister was beautiful. I always wanted to be like her when I grew up. I still do but I still have a lot of growing up to do. And Gracie looks like a princess in the dress Jade chose for her. I mean for a woman that hasn't worn a dress in ages, she sure knows how to pick the right style.

Then there's the exception of me. She had a few choices but we were going to butt heads regardless of her choices. She wants a long dress and I want short but I conceded and agreed to it if it was the one with one shoulder. Jade isn't my real mom but for as long as she's taken care of me, it feels like it and it was very evident in her reaction to the way I looked in the dress. She almost teared up when she saw me in the full length green creation. I let her have her moment.

You know me. Always wanting to get back to James.

So now two weeks have passed and Jade wants me to go to the zoo with Gracie and Frank. I love Gracie to death but why does Jade believe that Gracie will think we're abandoning her if one or the other of us isn't with her every day of the year? I know she would have been just as happy with Logan but Jade insisted. I know I wasn't very good to Gracie at the zoo and boy did I hear about it after the meeting. Am I so wrong to want to spend time with my boyfriend? I know Jade hadn't spent time with Kendall in forever but that wasn't my fault. She had made the choice to be planning a wedding so I should suffer? God is she going to be pissed off when she finds out I spilled the beans about the wedding when I went on my rant to James about how she took my phone from me. Apparently he wasn't on my side this time.

"_Um, Cas, let's go talk in your room shall we?" James raised his brow knowingly toward me._

_That couldn't be good but I agreed. He held the door for me and followed me down the hall to my room. He didn't even hold my hand like he usually does. Something is definitely up. Once we were inside my room I turned to him and said," What's going on?"_

"Cas, you know I love you. I'd do anything for you right?" He said as he took my hand.

_Now he holds my hand! We sat on the edge of the bed and I replied," Of course I do. Why are you asking me this?"_

"I think it might be a good idea if we weren't constantly on the phone like we were today. That was your family time."  
"So now you agree with Jade?"

"I just think that when I'm gone for three weeks and you're in the studio that it might be a good idea for you to be able to use your phone when it's necessary."

"And it's not now?!"

"That's not what I'm saying! God Cassie! I love spending time with you but I think Jade is right THIS time!"

I jerked my hand away from him and calmly walked to the door but there was no calmness as I jerked it open. I was pissed! I couldn't believe he agreed with Jade! I hate my sister! Fucking bitch! "Leave!"

"Cassie. Please!"

"We spent all afternoon together! Go!"

"_You're absolutely right, we did. Goodbye!" His gaze met mine before he stormed down the hall. I slammed the door behind him. Asshole! Gracie was right! Boys are stupid!_

JAMES

She's mad at me this time. I can't blame her but it's the right thing to do. I bet you all think I'm a pretty big jerk for agreeing with Jade right? I'm not. Cassie should have been spending time with her niece instead of texting me all day yesterday. I'm surprised Frank didn't blow the whistle on her before they got back to the hotel. I tried making up with her. I called and left I don't know how many messages for her. I even called Jade to make sure she was okay. I was informed that she jerked the roses out of the vase that was delivered and threw them at the delivery boy. Poor guy! She was taking it out on everyone but the one person she was angry with.

I even tried talking to her before the meet and greet while Kendall was busy doing the family thing with Jade and Gracie. I was beginning to think I'd be better off without a girlfriend but I thought about the way she smiled at me the first time and how soft and sweet her kisses were, I just couldn't fathom being without her. I couldn't wait for this meet and greet to be over. Don't get me wrong, I love the fans it's just that the one person I love more than life itself had said without any words to take a hike. I needed to find her and get this fixed before it got any more out of hand but in my effort to locate her, I walked into the meet and greet room to find Kendall and Jade…..well, let's just say they were going at it like a couple of horny teenagers. The only relief I was getting was from my hand these days. Not that I minded because I was willing to wait for her. That's if she'd still have me.

I continued my search and found her sitting on the edge of the stage; beating her feet against lower edge. I sat down beside her and she scooted away. "How can I fix this Cas?"

"You can leave me alone for starters."

"Oh good. You do have a voice still."

She glared at me but at least she was talking." Did you really think roses were going to fix the way I felt this time?"

"I was trying to apologize. We're not always going to agree on everything. No couple ever does."

"Then why does my sister always look so silly in love now?"

"Because she's learned the art of compromise. I'm not going to agree with everything you do or say but I'm willing to bend a little because I love you."

"I was a real brat wasn't I?" She scooted closer. Progress.

"We were both mad but I'd never seen that look in your eyes angelface. It scared me."

"You were scared?"

"It was the first time I saw signs of Jade in you."

"Oh crap. Don't tell me that."

"That's not a bad thing." I scooted closer to her.

"It's not?"

"The things your sister does for you are out of love, not because she wants to make your life miserable."

"I know you're right. I'm sorry." She moved close enough that our legs were touching. Her hand curved against my cheek and softly kissed me. I'm so glad she came to her senses because I don't think I could live without her.


	10. Chapter 10

CASSIE

I can't believe my sister's getting married in two days. TWO DAYS! This is the woman who said she would NEVER walk down the aisle again as long as she lived. I guess she keeled over somewhere along the way because she had planned the dream wedding of a lifetime. She thought I was paying attention to James all the time but I watched all the little things Kendall did for her and vice versa. I'm so glad Kendall hung in there. He's a good man and he's going to be a great father for Gracie. They both need him more than she'll ever admit to.

I could have killed her the next day when I heard what she did to him. Did she really think he wouldn't want to be a part of the planning? Seriously! Any man worth his weight in gold wants to have some part in the wedding. Maybe I have an idealistic view of the world but I knew her first wedding wasn't her dream. It was his. It was always about him but back to the present. Kendall has such a big heart and he wants to give all of it to her. She was ready to call off the wedding. There was no way in hell I was letting her give up the best thing that ever happened to her. I was surprised that she didn't ground me for life when I smacked her like I did. She actually thanked me for knocking some sense into her. I've learned many a thing from my big sis and one of them was that we stand by each other in good times and bad. That's why I made sure Kendall knew he wouldn't be very masculine if he hurt my sister. I know, I'm the angel compared to Jade but I do have my moments. I think I might have scared him.

So here we're finally here to the morning of the wedding and Gracie is being her usual charming little self. It was going to be a long day. I had to do my, Gracie and Jade's hair and Jade's was going to take the longest. I got lucky in that department with my natural curl. Hairstylists loved me. I was working on Jade's hair when Kendall's mom got there and I could see she loved the necklace he bought her and I knew she was going to give him a hard time about it. How he shouldn't spend his money on her like that. Maybe I'm a hopeless romantic but don't men buying you gifts benefit them as much as it does you? I mean you get something beautiful and when the time is right, so do they. When she got off the phone with him, I said, "Would you like me to put that on for you?"

"Why does he always do this to me Cassie?" She sighed as I released the bit of hair I was curling.

I set the iron on the counter and looked at my sister like she was nuts for having a man that loved her so much he wanted to give her the world.

"What?"

"Jade, I'd smack you again but I don't want to undo all the work I've accomplished so I'm going to tell you this. Kendall does it because he loves you. Not because he thinks he has to. It's a beautiful necklace. I would kill for James to give me something that nice. I love the things he's given me so far but don't knock it sis. Wear it. Let him know that it means as much to you as it does to him."

"How'd you get to be so grown up?"

"I have a couple of the best teachers." I looked at her then to Gracie. Jade smiled.

"What's so funny Mommy?" Gracie cocked her head full of curls to the side as Kendall's mom was trying to keep her occupied until Logan showed up.

"Your Aunt Cassie," Jade replied.

"Aunt Cassie is just goofy for boys now." She was still having a hard time forgiving me for the zoo. At her age, I guess I would have been too.

Jade looked up at me. "Give her a little more time. She'll forgive you eventually."

I sighed. I wasn't going to let this ruin my sister's wedding day so I changed the subject." Let's get this finished up. We've got a wedding to get to."

It was so beautiful. It was an outdoor wedding and they wrote their own vows. Very much Kendall and Jade. The way it should be. My sister was gorgeous! I almost felt invisible but it was her day so I was supposed to be but James told me I was the most beautiful one there. I knew he thought I was pretty but I knew Jade was the tops when it came to that department that day. I'd never seen my sister so happy in her entire life and I knew she would never be unhappy all because of Kendall. I have a brother in law. Wow! Never in a million years did I think that stupid game would lead to all this as fast as it did. But I'm glad it did. Now maybe I can be a normal teenager for a few minutes.

Okay so I'm not a normal teenager but if I'd have still been at home, I wouldn't have everything I do. My budding career thanks to my wonderful sister and a boyfriend that I love to death. I know I'm young but I know that he doesn't treat me that way either. I can see it every time I look into his eyes. Like right now. We'd been goofing for the camera for a while but he was holding me in his arms and my hands were laying against his chest.

"Have I told you how beautiful you are tonight? Especially in the moonlight."

Why that made me blush I'll never understand. He just always knew the right things to say. I couldn't tear my eyes from his. THEY looked pretty amazing here in the moonlight too. It wasn't until the flash of the camera that the spell was broke. It was time to eat anyway.

"Love you angel," he said and kissed me before we walked hand in hand toward the reception hall. I was gonnna marry him someday. I just knew it.

JAMES

I don't know why I was so nervous about tonight. I knew why. I'd never seen Cassie more beautiful and alive than she was. Her dress was absolutely gorgeous and I knew if Cassie had had it her way, she would have had a shorter hemline but the off the shoulder thing on one side was driving me crazy. I wanted to caress her delicate skin with my lips but I knew Jade would have my ass if I did. We were watching the couples on the dance floor and I was tempting fate by standing behind her with my arms wrapped around her waist. I pressed my lips against the crook of her neck and she said," Your lips are dangerously close to a part of my body Jade would kill you for."

"You don't like it?"

" I didn't say that but you know Jade will have a part of your anatomy I'll never get to have if they get any nearer."

So she did want to have sex with me one day. I knew that day was far off and even then there was the possibility that it wouldn't be an option. I had nine months of a relationship with my hand to look forward to. Whoopee! Stop it! You know you'll wait for her if it's until the very day you say your 'I do's' with her. "I know. I just thought she'd be too wrapped up in Kendall to notice anything going on with you."

"She's never too busy to notice what's going on with me. Especially where it concerns you," Cassie cocked her head and smiled up at me.

"Very true."

"But I can kiss you on the lips without her frowning upon it."

I didn't have to think twice about that one. I kissed her softly as the next song started to play. Oh great! Beiber. I knew it was Gracie's choice but I couldn't stand to be in the room while it was playing. "Maybe we should take a walk until this song is over," I suggested.

"No argument from me. Gracie wore this one out until I couldn't stand it."

I released her and she turned; taking my hand as I escorted her out of the reception hall. There was a slight breeze blowing and as much as I wanted to keep admiring Cassie's exposed body part but I knew she was getting a chill. I offered up my jacket and we continued walking hand in hand until we got to the spot in the garden where I planned to give her the ring. There was a nice little concrete bench and I sat down first; allowing her to sit on my lap. "Cas, I know we've only been seeing each other a few months now but I feel like I've known you a lot longer than that. I love you more than anything in this world you know that right?"

She nodded." What is this all about James?"

"Let me finish please."

She tried to hide her smile but I could tell she was failing miserably. This should be the easiest thing in the world. It is only a promise ring after all. I'm gonna be a fucking mess when I eventually ask her to marry me.

"I would move heaven and earth just to be with you angelface."

"I know."

"Then look in my pocket on the left hand side inside. I waited for her to pull out the small velvet box. "Open it."

Her breath caught. "It's beautiful James but what's it for?"

"It's my promise to you that no matter where I am or what I'm doing, I'll be there for you no matter what. That one day you'll be my one and only, forever."

Tears started sliding down her cheeks.

"Baby, are you okay?"

She nodded." Those are the most beautiful words anybody's ever said to me and meant them."

"But will you wear the ring?"

"Of course I will silly." She smiled then sniffled.

"I know we still have to keep this under the radar but you don't mind wearing this on your right do you?"

She shook her head. He placed the ring on her finger. Thank God for Jade! I had the perfect fit. She held her hand out and it glistened in the moonlight.

"I love you so much." She leaned in and kissed me. I could taste the salt of her tears on her lips as they touched mine. When she pulled away, her eyes met mine." You know that body part you've been dying to get near with your lips all night?"

"Yeah?"

She dropped my jacket from that shoulder. I guess it was her way of giving me a part of herself until we could be more. "Jade could catch us you know."

"I'll deal with Jade. It's a special occasion. Plus, I want you to."

I allowed myself to give in to her request. I couldn't deny her anything. I would never deny her anything. She was my life, my heart. She was my love, forever.


	11. Chapter 11

CASSIE

God it felt so good to know I'd be staying in one place for more than twenty four hours. I wanted to be a singer so being on the road is what it's all about. I did get to see some pretty cool places though thanks to James. It's a wonder the tabloids didn't have us dating already. Probably because Carlos or Logan would come along for the ride. We were very careful as to not show affection in public. I know it's only been a few hours but I miss James like crazy. It's gonna be torture when he leaves for South America.

Omigod! Did you see the ring he got me?! It's so pretty. It's a little heart with a pink stone in the middle of it. I am so lucky to have him . Jade still worries about us but she's always gonna do that. It's just the way she is. I hate it sometimes but I'd be way worse off if it wasn't for her.

I couldn't believe it when we pulled up to the new house. We were going to live here. Holy shit! It's huge! I've got my own room. A huge room!

You should see my bed! It's like something out of one of those romantic movies where the sheer white curtains are blowing in the wind. My sister is so cool. I have the dream bedroom. I have a big ole closet. I could buy an outfit and new pair of shoes every week and still not fill it up. You should see the view! I can see the pool in the backyard from my window. Maybe I'll have James meet me there one day then watch him while he wonders where I am. I love watching him when he gets that look on his face.

Oh! So back to my room! I have my very own makeup table, a nice dresser and did I mention my very own bathroom?! My bathtub is big enough to seat two comfortably. Not like I'd thought about that or nothing. Everybody thinks I'm this perfect little angel but I'm just like any girl my age. I'm curious about guys. What it would be like to get all hot and heavy like they do in those erotic romances. There was one I read the other day that was so hot I knew if Jade ever found it, I'd never see it again. Maybe I'll read my boyfriend a bedtime story one of these nights and see what happens. That ain't gonna happen as long as Jade's around that's for damned sure. Oh snap! My bathroom. It's got all kinds of seashells and colors from the ocean. It even has what they call his and her sinks in it too. Way cool!

If that wasn't enough, my favorite big sister bought me a brand new car! I can't believe she actually let me leave the house with James as overbearing as she's been lately. I wished to God she could get pregnant. At least that would explain her mood. She was unbearable then but I guess I would be too if I was carrying around a bowling ball on my body but that isn't going to happen for a LONG time. I love Gracie but I see how hard it is to raise a child. Does Jade really think I want to get knocked up at my age?! I know abstinence is the answer and I know it's killing my older boyfriend but he's a good guy. Any other guy would have said 'Fuck this shit' and walked out the door with Jade's tactics. Besides, I don't want to get big and fat. I'm insecure about my weight as it is. I know the world doesn't see what I see but I think I could stand to lose another ten pounds. You laugh like that's nothing but to a seventeen year old girl that wants to look hot for her boyfriend, it's everything.

So James and I finally find a place to stop. He knows the city better than I do so it was one of his secret places. Someplace he went just to get away from it all. I have to say I've never seen such a beautiful view. He wrapped his arms around my waist from behind. I'd been dying to get a good long kiss out of him since we left the house but apparently he wasn't in the same mood I was. I don't get guys. First they're all over you then it's like they cool their jets but I do have a sister that would kill him if he touched me that way before I was eighteen.

"Cas?"

"Yes?"

"I think we should capture the moment here."

"What do you mean?" I crooked my head to look up at him .

" The first moment we haven't been under the microscope of Jade since I put that ring on your finger."

I giggled." That's terrible."

"But it's true."

"I know. Get your camera out." I didn't want him to move away from me because I really liked the way it felt when he was close to me plus he was keeping me warm. I was wearing one of my lightweight slip dresses. I think it was turning him on from where I was standing. I don't know what that's supposed to feel like but oddly enough it stirred something up deep inside me.

"You okay Cassie?" He whispered as he held the phone out in front of us. I was once again snuggled against him; one arm firmly surrounding me and that strange sensation pressing against my fanny.

"I'm good. You?"

"I'm with you. Everything is perfect."

I was going to have to ask sis about that one. I mean I know guys are supposed to get stiff but as intimate as we'd been, I think he pulled away every time he was getting to that point of no return.

"There we go," he said and pulled the picture up on the screen. "I'll send this to your phone so you can have me just like I'll have you with me when I'm in South America."

He said the sweetest things! Once he secured his phone, I pounced on his lips.

"Whoa there angelface. I miss that too but we've got plenty of time still."

JAMES

As much as I wanted to get her in the backseat( and I was sure she felt that reason), I needed her to master the art of slow and sensual not hot and heavy every time we were together. I missed her like crazy but if we were going to make it to her eighteenth birthday(no guarantee it would even happen then), we were going to have to take it down a notch. Sure I was afraid of Jade but I could understand where she was coming from. Cassie was still very influential and learning the ways of a real relationship. I wanted her to be the one I grew old with. I am in love with her. That's the reason I do put on the brakes every so often. I've been down those roads she hasn't and falling in love isn't all about moonlight and roses. I want to give her those things but we need to take our time and get to know each other before her idealistic notions of romance take over.

"Why do you do this to me?" She pouted as she fidgeted with the edge of my shirt

"I do it because I don't want you thinking all we're about is the physical."

"Are you kidding me? Jade had to be gone for me to kiss you for the first time and the first time we got that close, I froze so I'd say I have no romantic notions about that."

"Then why is it you always are wanting to touch me the minute we're alone together?"

"Excuse me for wanting to be wrapped up in your arms, kissing you like it's the end of the world. Let's just go. It's obvious you don't want to be alone with me today."

She turned to unlock the door and I grabbed her arm; pulling her back toward me." I was dying to get out of the house or at least away from the crowd with you. I can't believe you would think otherwise. "

"Actions speak louder than words so if we're here to be away from the rest of the world, show me."

I hated that she thought just because I wasn't touching her, I didn't love her. She's a lot more mature than most women my age but she still has a lot of growing up to do where the physical part of this is concerned.

"It's Jade isn't it? She's got you so damn terrified that if you dare to touch me , she'll kill you."

"That's not it and you know it!" I shot back at her.

"Then take me in your arms and kiss me like even three seconds is too long for you to be apart from me."

I don't take ultimatums very well but she was right. I was fucking terrified of what Jade would do to me if anything like that hotel room incident occurred again. Oh to hell with it! Jade can kiss my ass. I love her little sister with all my heart and it's our relationship, not hers. Without further hesitation, I pulled Cassie into my arms and kissed her so deeply we were breathless by the time it was over.

She looked at me wide eyed then smiled. She could undo me with that thing. I should know better, she learned from the best.


End file.
